Ayahuasca is a healer. 

The word heal comes from the old English word hǣlan of Germanic origin, which means to ‘restore to sound health.’ This is exactly what ayahuasca does. It helps restore health while healing the broken parts of ourselves. However, this healing does not come easily. Ayahuasca reveals the pain and sorrow buried deep within the psyche and allows us to meet it head-on. It is only through this direct relationship with our pain that we can ignite the healing energies inside ourselves to move back toward sound health.

 

I spent several decades of my life entombing my trauma. My pain was enveloped in a cocoon deep inside my heart, and I locked away the butterfly key of freedom. My pain manifested in addiction and psychological turmoil. I ran from myself and hid in the superficial sunshine of adventure and physical sensation. I never acknowledged that I needed help, nor did I want to look weak—even though inside, I was screaming for support.

 

Several years ago, my Mother died, and something shifted. Some tribes in Peru believe that we go through our entire life energetically connected to our Mother’s umbilical cord. My Mother left me at age two and never really returned. She did try to reconnect with me at the end of her life, but I couldn’t find the strength to start again. This seed of sorrow submerged inside my heart blocked my ability to feel real love.

 

After my mother’s death, the energetic cord around my heart loosened. It started with books and podcasts. I spent time learning about trauma and asking my Dad about my childhood. I began to piece together a cryptic puzzle that was my life. I was pulled toward a pilgrimage of healing that led me to plant medicine. It started gradually with psilocybin, and I started to see a psychologist once a week. After several years of laying this foundation, I was called to a transformative year where I sat in a ceremony with ayahuasca over twenty times in 12 months. My friends and family challenged my path. “You are going again?” they would frequently ask. I felt judged. I couldn’t explain my actions to my rational self, and it took strength to wade through the criticism of those around me. I was pulled by something magical, and I was ready to answer the call.

 

Western culture has traditionally used medicine to treat superficial wounds of the flesh and psyche. However, ayahuasca works on a deeper level, healing the soul and helping to release deep traumas and pernicious ancestral energic patterns attached to our etheric bodies. The etheric body is part of our energetic field, and it is attached to our physical form. Thus anything that influences the etheric body will also appear in physical form. Clearing or releasing negative energies from the etheric field can bring deep healing to the physical body.

 

 

Ayahuasca is a magician. 

I have heard it said many times by both participants and teachers, “ayahuasca is magic.” Before taking ayahuasca, I never believed in magic, and I still cannot explain many things that happened to me during the ceremony. I remain skeptical yet open. Christian Funder said it well in his book Grandmother Ayahuasca, “[Ayahuasca] reveals that the mind has almost cosmic proportions, and to try to explain exactly what will happen upon ingestion of this plant medicine would be a fool’s errand.” 

 

Before every ceremony, one of my teachers says, “I have no idea what will happen.” After sitting over twenty times in one year, I can wholeheartedly report back that it is always different, and it is never what you expect it to be. Never.

 

The plant has a spirit. I am not sure what that even means, but it feels right to say it. I’ve learned this year that my relationship with the plant has evolved. I have come to honor and respect my connection to ayahuasca, and I feel a kinship building as I dance with her. She is a living entity, embodying the magical spirit of the jungle and cosmos. She is introducing me to myself through myself and restoring my ability to connect with the divine. I know that’s a big word, and I don’t use it lightly, but it’s the best way to describe what I think is happening.

 

Ayahuasca is powerful and mysterious, and the more gratitude and humility I bring to her, the deeper my healing is. I am still learning to open a conversation with her, pray to her, ask her questions and praise her power and wisdom. I know that it might feel strange to speak with a plant, but I feel that she is listening and wants to communicate.

 

Ayahuasca is a  teacher. 

All great teachers ignite something deep within us. They remind us of our potential, and they model a holistic way of being. Good teachers move us closer to wholeness, and they help us deconstruct and rebuild those parts of ourselves that migrated away from our hearts. As Don Jose Campos said so eloquently in the book The Shaman and Ayahuasca,

 

Once when I drank Ayahuasca, she very gently explained to me, she told me, “Look, I give to you, but I take away.” So I insisted, “What do you give me? And what do you take away?” She said, “I take away defects and I give you responsibilities.

 

Much of our inner wisdom lies dormant in the shadows of our being, hidden behind our childhood wounds. Our superpowers lie just behind these wounds, and the healing starts once we hold ourselves up to the truth and allow the light of clarity in. Don Jose Campos reminds us that this light also brings in responsibility. 

 

Ayahuasca dissolves defense mechanisms and cracks our hearts open, allowing grief and sadness to be felt. It’s a hard journey and requires a warrior’s courage. Ayahuasca is not for everyone, but when it is for you, you will know because she will call you to her side, and you will not doubt your path. It happened to me suddenly and it could also happen to you. As said by both Buddhists and Theosophists, “when the student is ready, the teacher will appear.”

 

Ayahuasca is a therapist.

Ayahuasca is benevolent, and she is merciless. Ayahuasca understands that real healing reveals the obscurity found in the darkness of our souls. Some people fear ayahuasca not because it creates scary hallucinations but because it exposes the ugliness of our past behaviors and holds us accountable to the truth.

 

Some people say that one night of drinking ayahuasca is like ten years of therapy—for me, it’s been a wonderful supplement to work (including therapy) that I was already doing in my life. Ayahuasca is like a therapist, but it doesn’t replace therapy. We are complex beings, and working with a therapist may help you in ways you never thought possible. 

 

Ayahuasca pulls nuggets of self-knowledge into the light, but it does so like a warrior tearing a sword out of a wound. Most therapy is more gentle; it takes time and requires a commitment to regular sessions. Ayahuasca is more direct. 

 

I’d like to put in an icaro here before we end. Many people view icaros as song to the spirit, I like to think of them as prayers. This one come from the book mentioned earlier, The Shaman and Ayahuasca:

 

Ayahuasca, Ayahuasquita Mamancura yari-ri
Sinchi sinchi medicina yari-ri
Limpia limpia cuerpcito yari-ri
Limpia limpia espirito yari-ri
Sinchi sinchi medicina yari-ri
Sinchi sinchi Icarito yari-ri
Chuya chuya medicina yari-ri
Tukui Tukui almacita yari-ri
Tukui Tukui huanquincito yar-ri

 

Ayahuasca Mother of all Plants 

The power of your medicine

Cleanses my body

Cleanses my spirit

The power of your medicine

The power of the Icaro 

Pure white medicine 

Cleanses your soul 

Cleanses you, my brother and my sister

 

The naked soul both rejoices and quivers at her sight. The soul recognizes that the heart is the doorway toward joy, and ayahuasca helps open that door and allows us to regain the throne of love’s kingdom.

 

May she call you back to your throne.